What would a relationship be like if it is love minus sex?
This shocking experience of a 22-year-old girl after dating an asexual boy reveals everything about persons doesn’t like sex.
Asexuality remains the most misunderstood among all types of sexualities. There are people who just don’t like sex; they don’t hate it and they don’t love it.
The girl’s experience begins here:
“I am a 22-year-old girl and I met Ranjan* through social media, exchanged numbers and went out for movies but with other friends along. He was a little unlike most men, he talks less and we felt more each other. I loved the way he was so like a boyfriend any girl would want.”
“We went out for coffees, for movies, for shopping, for grocery buying, for plays, for eating out, for everything and anything. I loved the way he was so like a boyfriend any girl would want, a friend but more than that.”
“It was all going well except one thing, it had been two months that we were seeing each other but we hadn’t even exactly held hands. I wanted him to initiate, I keep waiting.”
“Even after Five months, no kisses and not even holding hands. I started doubting if we were dating at all or not. He would say that he loves me but that was the only thing we did like other couples. My patience was exhausting.”
“He was bidding me a goodbye when I decided I had to kiss him. That was exactly our half-year anniversary. He seemed happy and so was I, but there was something in my behavior that had started showing it and Ranjan were picking on it too.”
“We went out ice-skating, had dinner and he was bidding me a goodbye when I decided I had to kiss him. It was a cold evening and we were parked outside my house. I hugged him and made sure that I do so tightly and long and I followed it by an attempt at kissing him. As soon as I approached him for one and was almost there, he held back.”
“Next morning, he asked me to meet him again, though I was a bit reluctant. All sorts of insecurities took the better of me and I thought I wasn’t attractive enough to get him to my bed. I was sexually active with my last boyfriend and so, I was literally craving for sex now, leave alone a kiss.”
“When I look back at it now, this day had changed my life. I didn’t even know asexuality was a thing before Ranjan told me what he told me that day. We met and he said that he loves me but doesn’t like physical contact. He tried to apologize for it and said that he never wanted to upset me but somehow, kissing someone would make him cringe.”
“I was bewildered and went all fuming when he said that he may be an asexual. I went back home and googled everything about asexuality. Here are a few of the most important things I read and in case you don’t know, it will be helpful.”
Asexuals have no interest in sex. But this doesn’t mean they don’t want relationships or intimacy. They love you but don’t crave physical intimacy. However, they do get physically attracted to you but let’s say, it is like that they like being around you and to look at you.
Nothing more, nothing less. They can even hold hands, hug, sleep next to you, etc. but they take time. As far as sex was concerned, it was nothing for them. Just like you would watch a family dinner scene in a movie, they would watch porn.
“It needed a bit for me to get back to the way I was before I knew about Ranjan’s sexuality. However, Ranjan started growing resentful and a little moody. It was only later that I realized that he felt guilty about the way he was. He felt that he wasn’t able to keep me happy and that would get him mad. Things between us went on for a while but the more practical part of me thought it better to part ways for both of us.”
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