Grief is a natural reaction to loss. Relationship grief is the grief due to breakup or divorce of a love relationship. The breakup or divorce of a love relationship involves multiple losses. It includes loss of companionship and shared experiences (which may or may not have been consistently pleasurable), loss of support, be it financial, intellectual, social, or emotional.
‘Grief is also very personal. It’s not very neat or linear. It doesn’t follow any timelines or schedules. You may cry, become angry, withdraw, feel empty. None of these things are unusual or wrong. Everyone grieves differently, but there are some commonalities in the stages and the order of feelings experienced during grief,’ says Therapist Lalitaa Suglani.
‘Relationship grief isn’t just about someone you love passing away, it’s about the grief that comes when you have to let go of an idea you had for your future. It’s when you have to grieve the future you wanted to share with someone or when you have to let go of the idea that your family will look a certain way,’ she added.
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Different types of relationship grief:
Stranger Syndrome: Knowing that a person used to be intimate with you and now they are just a stranger is tremendous. This transition can have a big impact in us.
Unfulfilled expectations: People have expectations from the relationship we are in. Most people make up scenarios of the future and how things will turn out to be. When a relationship ends, we feel that the expectations remain unfulfilled.
Loss of intimacy and connection: Coping up with the thought that the deep intimacy that we once shared with the person has been lost can be very challenging.
Loneliness: When a significant person leaves, we are left with a void. That can make us feel isolated and lonely, not knowing right away how to fill the void.
‘Lost shared dreams: The dreams that we once had together with the person seem to be lost, and it can be challenging to fight that thought.
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