A sexless marriage can be an emotionally painful experience for both partners. If you’re having sex less than once a month, you’re in a sexless marriage. While the definition varies, most experts consider 10 times a year or less to qualify. This can be tough for many couples, as sex is an important part of intimacy and bonding.
Common Causes
Stress and exhaustion: Between work, kids, health issues, and other life stresses, sex can fall to the bottom of the priority list. Making time to connect and unwind is key.
Relationship issues: Lack of emotional intimacy, unresolved resentment or anger, lack of attraction, etc. Addressing communication and relationship roadblocks is important.
Also Read: Physically stronger men and women have more sexual partners, says study
Low libido: Hormonal changes, medications, health conditions, and ageing can all contribute to a decreased sex drive in one or both partners. Speaking to a doctor may help determine if there are any medical issues impacting your libido.
Lack of intimacy: Without regular emotional and physical intimacy, sexual desire may start to wane. Make spending quality time together a priority and engage in regular affectionate touch like kissing, hugging, and cuddling.
For a partner with a lower libido, the pressure to be intimate when you’re not in the mood can lead to feelings of guilt, anxiety, and resentment. Not feeling desired by your spouse can also damage self-esteem over time.
For the partner with a higher libido, constant rejection and unmet needs often result in frustration, hurt, and anger. You may feel unattractive or unloved, even though you know rationally that isn’t the case. Over time, resentment may build as physical intimacy becomes a source of conflict rather than connection.
Lack of sex also deprives couples of oxytocin, the “love hormone” released during orgasm that strengthens feelings of closeness and bonding. Without this, partners may start to feel more like roommates than lovers and the emotional distance between them grows.
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