
Your sex life is largely influenced by what’s happening in your brain. Specifically, your brain chemicals — neurotransmitters like dopamine, oxytocin, serotonin and Endorphins (D.O.S.E.) — affect sex life. These brain chemicals control not just your sex drive but your actual experience of sex from start to finish. The pathways in your brain that use these chemicals to regulate your sex life are highly sensitive to all kinds of influences.
Dopamine is the chemical that makes you feel good and keeps you coming back for more. This ‘feel-good’ hormone is released in your brain during pleasurable activities, like eating, exercise, and of course, sex. Dopamine is responsible for that rush of attraction and excitement you feel when you first start dating someone. Dopamine also activates the reward centre in your brain, giving you a natural high from physical intimacy and orgasm. The more dopamine is released during sex, the more you associate that person or activity with pleasure and reward.
Oxytocin is often called the “love hormone” because of its important role in social bonding and reproduction. This hormone is released during intimate physical contact with another person, like hugging, kissing, and sex. When oxytocin is released during these pleasurable experiences, it makes you feel good by activating the reward centres in your brain.
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Oxytocin also increases arousal and sexual pleasure for both men and women. In women, oxytocin stimulates the cervix and vagina, increasing lubrication and intensifying orgasms. For men, oxytocin boosts arousal, erection, and ejaculation. Higher levels of oxytocin during sex can also increase feelings of affection and attachment towards your partner. This may explain why couples often feel an emotional closeness after being intimate. Regular sex in a relationship leads to a steady release of oxytocin, which helps to strengthen the emotional and social bond between partners over the long run.
Testosterone is the hormone most associated with sex drive and arousal in both men and women. Even though men produce much more testosterone, it plays an important role in a woman’s libido and sexual satisfaction as well. Testosterone fuels your sex drive by stimulating the production of dopamine in your brain that makes you crave sex. When you’re aroused or engage in sexual activity, your testosterone levels rise, which in turn boosts your dopamine levels. This creates a feedback loop that makes you want more sex.
Women experience a surge in testosterone around ovulation when fertility is highest. This often corresponds with an increased interest in sex at this point in the menstrual cycle. As women age and testosterone levels decline, many experience a drop in libido and arousal.
For men, testosterone levels peak in the teens and early 20s, then slowly decrease over time. By a man is 60s or 70s, testosterone levels can drop by 50% or more from his peak. This is a major reason why libido and erectile function tend to decline with age.
Estrogen, the primary female sex hormone, plays an important role in your sex life and libido. Estrogen is responsible for the development and regulation of the female reproductive system. In women, estrogen levels fluctuate throughout the menstrual cycle and over a lifetime. These fluctuations can directly impact a woman’s sex drive and arousal.
For men, estrogen works together with testosterone to regulate sex drive and function. Although testosterone is the primary male sex hormone, men also have estrogen in their bodies. If a man’s estrogen levels are too high or too low, it can negatively affect his libido and performance.
Serotonin is a neurotransmitter that helps regulate your mood and happiness levels. Serotonin impacts your libido and arousal levels, especially in women. When your serotonin levels are in a good balance, you’re more likely to feel romantic and in the mood. But if serotonin levels are off, it can reduce your sex drive and make it harder to become aroused.
Some things that can disrupt your serotonin balance include:
• Stress and anxiety
• Lack of sunlight
• Poor diet
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